Behind Blue Eyes {Write on Edge/Trifecta}

Daphne realized the enormity of the snub as she applied a third coat of mascara.

Robotic and familiar her fingertips rubbed blush into the apple of her cheeks and then rummaged through the cases and brushes before selecting a palette, sliding the bristles across the powdery hue before transferring it onto her eyelids in swift easy strokes.

Her hair was dry but hanging in her eyes and her lips were bare, waiting for a ruby stripe of color to perk them up.

When was the last time she’d looked at herself?

Weeks?

Months?

Under the fluorescent lights of her bathroom she calculated;  ticked off the moments when she’d glanced at an outfit, straightened a skirt or decided on a shoe in the glass without allowing her gaze to creep up to her own face. Suddenly nauseous and dizzy Daphne gripped the ceramic sink to steady herself.

It was an old joke that her hazel eyes became indigo when she was sad seemingly taking on the color of her disposition.

They were her tell-tale heart. Spilling all her secrets even when her glossy red mouth lifted in a smile; a weak, airy phantom of a happiness she hadn’t felt in a very long time.

She wondered how much longer she would pine for what could have been without sinking down into a bed of hopelessness? Or how many times she could refuse to have her picture taken for fear of what the film would expose? Days would  eventually melt into weeks until she’d  stand at another porcelain pedestal  and confess that she was existing in a half life, ignoring her existence  and waiting for the jolt that would startle her back into her own life.

Stand back folks, turn up the juice. 

Yearning for a peaceful end to it was what forced her eyes up and into deep pools of azure, as blue as the Caribbean.

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Write on Edge’s Prompt this week is
PINE

Trifecta’s Prompt this week is

Phantom:

3 :  a representation of something abstract, ideal, or incorporeal – 

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I am also excited to call myself a Published Author this week.
My story “Kismet’s Kiss” is part of

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Precipice Volume 2, The Literary Anthology of Write on Edge. 

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Have you picked up your copy yet?

It is a fantastic collection of stories, poems and memoirs from some of the best voices on the internet.

I promise you’ll love it.

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About Kir

Kirsten is a wife after years of dating, a mom after years of infertility & a lover of shoes, words, NYC and TV dramas. A storyteller and daydreamer at heart, this is the place where her stories come to be told. Thanks for visiting.

Comments

  1. Oh – it took me a minute to catch the end, there. You capture her pain and despair so well. Great use of details – I like how her eyes turn blue to fit her mood. I admit I’m not entirely sure why she won’t look at herself or let her picture be taken, or what the snub was – is she longing for youth? Was she in an accident? I can’t quite tell…

    • kpiccini@weichertrealtors.net says:

      I’m not sure either, but I remember during a particularly bad breakup before I got married that I literally didn’t look at myself in the mirror for months, I sidestepped myself. I looked in the mirror but never directly into my own eyes as if I couldn’t bear to see the sadness there.

      Does that make sense?

  2. To be unable to face yourself in the mirror must be the saddest thing.. you express it so well in your writing.. and congratulations on being published.

  3. Oh! My heart ached for the poor girl, while I hoped that her reflection would show an eye color other than blue. Well done, Kit!

  4. Kir, My heart aches for her-and it’s all because of the eloquent way you have of telling us about her. When a person loses faith in him or herself to the point that they can’t look at themselves, it has to be absolute rock bottom. I want to give her a hug:)

    And my friend-you so deserve to be published!! I’m honored to be right alongside you! xx

  5. When the person you most need to avoid is yourself. yeah, that’s a tough one.
    Love the colors in here.
    Congrats on the book, Kir!

  6. At least she looked at herself in the end. That’s a start. Sad story, Kir, but as usual, very well done. She’s hurting terribly that comes through. Nice work. Congrats on your publication! So cool and deserved! (I’ll join you again at write on edge in a week or two. Visitors and travel are cutting into my time. :) )

  7. Beautiful, sad – so many emotional colors here, Kir! Congratulations on your story being published, this is a great moment! Hugs my friend.

  8. I know the “not looking” thing. You tell sad stories so well. Of course, you rock the romance too. But I felt this. And love the image in my mind of her eyes being like a modring in their changing colors.

    A big, fat congrats on the publishing! You are awesome and I’d be green if I wasn’t so happy for you and how much you deserve it!!!!!!!!!

  9. Oh,that'[s so painful to feel so unworthy that one doesn’t care about oneself any more and just goes through the motions.An intense piece and I loved the end and my favourite sentence was,”They were her tell-tale heart. Spilling all her secrets…”Fantastic Kir!

    Hearty congratulations on being published :-)

  10. First of all – congratulations on being published! That’s terrific news – well done you!

    With regards to this very nice flash story, I really liked the idea of reflecting those feelings when it’s difficult to look at ourselves, whether because we’re lonely, alone, sad, or something else. Self confidence gets a knockout when any of those things happen, doesn’t it? You’ve focused a light on those dark days. Nicely done, Kir.

    And again – hugs on your published story!

  11. Congratulations on being published, Kir! Love how you depict the sadness here, especially the role of her eyes – the “tell-tale heart”. Nicely done. Thanks for linking up!

  12. First off, major congrats on being published. You are a fantastic writer and so, so deserving. That is a goal of mine as well. I’m just thrilled for you, my friend!

    There is such a heart-wrenching sadness to this piece. It’s so very palpable. I just wanted to hug her or buy her a drink–probably both. You are so adept at making the reader care about your characters. Well done … again. :)

  13. How deep her despair if she can’t face herself. Another instance of self blame? It’s hard to not question yourself when in the grip of depression.

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