Feelings. Focused.

The photo was worn at the corners so that its fringy edges fanned out like frayed peacock feathers, colors seeping into one another; a captured moment stained by tears and misunderstandings.

She supposed  the image would  have remained that way, unchanged, forever,  if he hadn’t called, 2 years later, asking her to lunch in a halted , “um”-filled and uncharacteristically contrite speech.

So she dressed in a skirt that barely hit her knee and sat across from him checking and resetting her heart.

The silence between them was almost translucent as she focused on his face.

His eyes said it all.

*************************************

Write on Edge:

“When images become inadequate, I shall be content with silence.”
~Ansel Adams

Velvet Verbosity

LUNCH

Velvet Verbosity 100 Word Challenge

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About Kir

Kirsten is a wife after years of dating, a mom after years of infertility & a lover of shoes, words, NYC and TV dramas. A storyteller and daydreamer at heart, this is the place where her stories come to be told. Thanks for visiting.

Comments

  1. I love your words.

    (One teeny, tiny concrit: you use frayed twice in the first sentence, and I think it would be stronger if you took out one of them. The second could be something else: faded maybe?)
    angela recently shared…Escaping the coldMy Profile

    • kpiccini@weichertrealtors.net says:

      thanks Angie…
      and I had used worn , but I wrote it and didn’t type it in (I was working from the car and then it didn’t come over…thanks for bringing it me. Reminding me)
      thanks for coming over to read…:)

  2. Such a short piece, but packed full of the emotions that come about when a lost love returns. Strong scene with carefully placed details.

    I also like the image of checking and resetting her heart, but it got twisted up in using “setting” twice so close together. Maybe just take out “the settings”?
    Roxanne recently shared…In a cold, quiet house.My Profile

  3. So many emotions in this piece. You are a master at writing real characters.
    Tara R. recently shared…Cowboys and iron horsesMy Profile

  4. So packed with emotion. I love the line “she sat across from him, checking and resetting her heart. It is perfect.

  5. Kir, your command of this scene is flat-out impressive. It’s compact but perfect. Love the image of the peacock. Well done!

  6. You paint some serious pictures with your writing, and the emotions are tangible. “Checking and resetting her heart” is a great line. Lovely!
    Hala J. recently shared…Hide and Seek (100-Word Fiction)My Profile

  7. “its fringy edges fanned out like frayed peacock feathers”

    I love that.
    Cameron recently shared…A Haiku for Tuesday MorningMy Profile

  8. Short, sweet and well executed. The revenge skirt… nice touch! Enjoyed it.
    Michael Walker recently shared…BlindMy Profile

  9. I loved that little sentence about resetting her heart. I long for those great lines that never quite make it into my writing!
    Missy Kierstead recently shared…Polished to a Glossy ShineMy Profile

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